Men and Women

A man will pay $2 for an item that costs $1 if he wants it. 
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't want because it's on sale.

A woman worries about he future until she gets a husband. 
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find that man.

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. 
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and don't expect to understand her at all.

Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

Any married man can forget his past mistakes: there's no reason for
two people to keep track of the same things.

A woman marries a man expecting him to change, and he doesn't. 
A man marries a woman expecting her not to change, and she does.

A woman has the last word in any argument. 
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.